I don’t know where I’m at right now. I’m a bit sad which often finds me here. I’m in that place where I wish I was a girl. What a stupid notion sometimes I think to myself. What a weird desire to have had strongly throughout life and when it churned on in the background–a… Continue reading Dear World
Blog
Suspended female
It’s been a while since I’ve posted. My account got suspended on livejournal for a while and it took a week or two to resolve that. I wonder if someone flagged it or if their system automatically flagged it for spam. My last entry had a ton of links on it. I had been emailing… Continue reading Suspended female
Transbrainia
I just wanted to post about the brains of those who are transgender. It’s possible that for trans we may have brains of the desired (or identified) gender. So next time you think about the biological connection reconsider what you’re saying. There’s more to bodies and our development than strictly genetic development. Although it’s possible… Continue reading Transbrainia
Gender Confirmation Surgery and detrans
So I’ve been questioning my gender identity pretty hard lately. I had a discussion with my friends. One of them mentioned how they talked to a receptionist at a doctor’s office who said more than half of the trans patients had complications. I’m not sure if this was in regards to HRT or surgery or… Continue reading Gender Confirmation Surgery and detrans
Doubt and Dysphoria
Today I woke up, the first thought is I’m not a woman. Why is that my first thought everyday? I don’t know why I wake up and expect something different to happen. I don’t remember what my dreams have been about lately I half wonder if I am a girl in all of them. Living… Continue reading Doubt and Dysphoria
A Prayer…
A prayer for all those hearts seekingsomething to fill the void deep in their soulto find themselves whole. A prayer for all those hearts hurtingaching for the truths they findand the truths hidden away. A prayer for those who have lostto those missing their loved onestorn away from our world into the next. A prayer… Continue reading A Prayer…
How did I know
I mean I kind of didn’t know. Because I doubt everything I still wonder if I’m wrong about this. I can’t remember when but I remember in high school being really interested in transgender. At that point I wasn’t interested–as far as I knew–for myself but just one of those really interesting things people go… Continue reading How did I know
Transition Timeline
Some of this is mtf specific but some of it is general. Anyway should you exhibit gender dysphoria and wish to transition a timeline might look something like this: Accepting being trans. Usually described as trans “pre-everything.” I’m not sure if this is much of a stage but it involves coming to terms with the… Continue reading Transition Timeline
Hello World
Hello everyone. I’m creating this journal to blog mostly about transitioning. My name is Hannah, I’m a 36 year old trans woman (so I’m male to female), pre-everything at this point. I guess I should talk about my journey thus far. And what it means to be trans. Square one: Gender Dysphoria. I think I’ll… Continue reading Hello World